well today is 23/5/2009.this is the 1st day i start writing my own story on this blog or it can be say 4m today onwards this will be my diary...my dailly life story perharps.well today i just receive the letter 4m utar and this coming tuesday i gotta report myself at there.well i will be staying there but now there is a probolem that is my mom's friend-andrew haven get me a room thats why this really makes me worry.well actually i got my own plans.this week i dont think so i can go down to kl to meet my love one rahul because i got a feeling my parents will ask me back home.well i think i gotta make up plan as fast as i could so i can get down to meet rahul.well i really miss him a lot.nowadays i can get to bed after 3am or maybe later.well two days ago i chat with my senior-foong chang fei which is a very great guy.well i had closed my msn account because i dont want anything to hurt rahul anymore.i really dont want.last week we got a big fight that is he went to chat with my god brother or may be i should say that bloody idiot who ruined our relationship.that idiot accused me that im going to look 4 some guys as my new bf and he also accused that rahul already got a new indian gf but in fact i didint.rahul was really angry and we had a very big fight.
well it is really a sad because that day he told me that we are no longer gf and bf and he got a new gf.i really cry a lot that day but i cant do anything.the next day,rahul called up and he apologized to me.i cried again so hard on the phone because i really cant believe that we had just break up.well i knew this time really do hurt him a lot and i knew it takes time.well last two days i went to chat with my senior foong chang fei and he gave me a lot of advice.he told me one thing which i will never forget.well he said to me love is a the purest thing in life.it is not slefish or greedy.it is not hate and it do takes a lot of time.well that day i went to bed at 5.40am after i chat with him.he really give me a lot of advises and the next day i didnt contact rahul at all.i know it do takes time but hey is ok.well rahul he got a lot things ahead him and this time he really gotta take a lot time.well actually today he did called me but i didnt answer.im really scare.i dont want us to fight anymore.i dont us to end up quarreling hurting each other.and i dont want us to make our relationship more worse.i really dont want.i really cant afford to lose rahul again.i really cant.it is very hard.4m that day he looked back 4 me i was really touched and i really love him a lot.4m that day i told myself this is the guy that i will spent the rest of my life with him.im willing to give up anything just to be with him.
i really miss him a lot.a lot until i want to hold him in my arms and never let him to leave me anymore.well now everyday i do my prayer and i wish to god that i can do well in my studies and also in my relationship.i also pray that i can be with rahul forever happily and also i wish that our relationship can be back like how it use to be.so sweet.this is all i just for.well beside this today i got went to the facebook and i leave a message to my god brother-jonathan and also two of my close friend seow zhong cheng and jordan chan.well i really miss my dear god brother jonathan.now when i think back i have been his sister for 5 years.since i was with rahul when im only form 2,he asked me to be his god sister because he is 4m a single family at the same time.wow...it is very nice wasnt it? he is my 1st god brother and i really do love him as my own brother.i have taken him as my own family.well i really miss rahul a lot.my dear one.
"the most beautiful thing in this world cannot been seen or touched,
it must be felt by the heart"
i love you my dear rahul...muak...forever.........
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Hye there...
ReplyDeletein my opinion,u are probaly doing sumting wrong dats y diz kinda problems tend 2 arise in ur love life..1 of all do u really understand whats the meaning of i love u??dun simply say it if u dun understand the meaning..u have 2 find out the cause of it and try 2 resolve things asap before its 2 late..dats all 4 nw..anyting juz hit me bck,carez
ReplyDeletewell thanks 4 ur comment...hmm..love...seriously telling i reli dun anything bout love anymore..but now wat can i do somemore? every time i try to talk to him nicely but in the end we will end up fighting and tears...i reli cant take it anymore...i told him b4 i reli cant take it if we break up again cuz i reli dun wan us to just end up like this...4 5 years ard why now only we end up this relationship wor?? i reli cant take it seriously but wat can i do some more to let him trust me again? last time i betrayed him b4 but he still willing to accept me and i promise not to hurt him and stay away those who arent a true fren of mine and i did...but now why wor? i reli don understand...now wat he say is true perhaps im just a useless thing which doesnt benefit him at all!!!! all i know is just cry only tats all...n every night i reli cry a lot until im tried n felt asleep...im reli very tired...
ReplyDeleteHei there,hv went through ur comment..wow,5 years har??dats seriously a long long time..in my opinion, u shud ask him y is he acting like dat..find out what is the cause like i said..ok,u hv said dat u hv betrayed him before rite..what did u betrayed him n y did u do dat???
ReplyDeleteif u really love sum1,u would never betraye or hurt dat person..try asking urself,do u really love him and if yes y did u betrayed him..u shud tell him bout diz,may be rite nw he is thinking dat u are betraying him dats y all diz is happening and dats y he does not trust u..dun blame him ok,its not his fault..try putting urself in his shoes n den u will noe hw it feels..
right nw u have 2 be strong and confident..u have 2 hv faith and trust in urself and ur love..do not give up and juz lose,and this time try not 2 mess things up..u have 2understand ur partner,probaly what he is doing is 4 ur own good and because he really loves n care bout u 2..LOVE is all about giving and taking not taking only..keep up strong k..dats it 4nw,anyting hit me bck..careZ.......